"It Is a Tough Struggle With Setbacks, But We Are Succeeding."

Posted a new picture (taken during the Holiday season) and updated the only stat I have (which is my poundage). As you can see neither of these things seem to be moving in a positive direction. I know that photos are not always the best source and a number on the scale does NOT (should not) equal myself worth. However, I cannot help but feel like this is a big obstacle and that I gave up on my goals and me.

If you have a setback, and you are not doing well and then you overcome it somehow, it always sticks with you. You know it could happen again.
- Sam Donaldson

I can say that I have not thrown in the towel, I WILL NOT yield to bad/old habits this time (regardless of the hurdle).

I have too often just quit when I have had a setback. Either deciding to start over, when things get too out of hand or, when motivation [finally] smacks me upside the head.

For example in December, I felt that things were very poor in my life and I knew that I was into bad habits. My gym decided to shut down and it was my only workout. Finding a new way to workout was going to require a major overhaul to my lifestyle. I would need to spend way more money than I was, join a "random" gym (which did not work for me in the past), walk etc outside (my workout friend not a fan of this), or go to something that is before work or after 7pm.

I gave up on Working out. Not exercising made me f-up my pattern of eating, since I was filling my body full of junk (with excuses and justifications) it behooved me to ignore the crap I was putting in my body I and stopped logging my habits.

As I was falling into my "normal" death spiral, I gave in to emotional eating. Spiked off the charts & looked for booze and junk food to silence my feelings of remorse and disgrace. I was faking positivity, by telling myself garbage such as, "I think I need to re-boot my plans and give a little extra effort" (that will fix things) and "I am going to take a break from all of this and start again, when I am calm and more in control."

I am sad about the disastrous choices I made in December. In spite of this, I refuse to concede defeat. I will keep my goals this is NOT a new starting point, just a bump in the road. I am just going to work on very small things. By not giving in (plus changing my behavior), I will be able to work on my health goals, mind powers, and a happier environment.

Quote for This Post
I knew that I did not have to buy into society's notion that I had to be handsome and healthy to be happy. I was in charge of my "spaceship" and it was my up, my down. I could choose to see this situation as a setback or as a starting point. I chose to begin life again.
- Warren Mitchell